Friendship Is the Front Door to the Gospel

The best evangelistic moments in my life haven’t come through short-term mission trips, digital outreach, tabling, or door-to-door evangelism, but through friendships. Evangelism is intimidating and many Christians never take the step to share the gospel, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Friendship is the front door to the gospel, and if you start by building friendships with an aim to make Jesus known, you’ll be amazed at the opportunities that arise. 

Let me tell you about how my friendship with Sanjay led to dozens of chances to share the gospel.

RELATIONAL EVANGELISM IS OFTEN INCONVENIENT AND TIME CONSUMING

Often, friends of mine object to relational evangelism because they don’t want to turn “people into projects.” Perhaps, you’ve been afraid to do this in your life. Maybe that’s because you’ve seen someone share the gospel in a way that feels forced or insensitive. But relational evangelism isn’t at odds with loving people well. It’s actually the best way to share the gospel while showing Christ’s love to them. 

Relational evangelism isn’t flashy and there’s nothing rapid about it. This approach to sharing Jesus takes time. I remember meeting an Indian student. We’ll call him Sanjay. I met him at a dinner hosted for international students in our city and that evening marked the beginning of a two and a half year friendship that was filled with ups and downs. Sharing Jesus with Sanjay was inconvenient and time consuming. 

Our schedules awkwardly clashed with one another and he didn’t have a car so I always had to pick him up. But I decided to invite Sanjay into the normal rhythms of my life. I brought him to dinners at my home with my friends from college, invited him to join me on Sundays to church, and took him along with me to spend the day at our state park. Over time, Sanjay became a normal part of my life and I was able to share the gospel with him dozens of times.

RELATIONAL EVANGELISM IS BEAUTIFULLY HOLISTIC

In my friendship with Sanjay, I learned a lot about how relational evangelism is beautifully holistic. When we think of evangelism, we often emphasize the words that we say. Christians in the past have been tempted to downplay the “words” in evangelism to focus solely on “deeds.” This is a mistake, but in our circles, it may be too easy to focus on the “words” we share without showing non-Christians the “deeds” that adorn the gospel. 

Here’s what I mean: During my friendship with Sanjay, he was regularly exposed to Christian community. He was surprised by the way that we loved one another and genuinely interested at how fervently young adults in our church were about following Jesus. 

A few years into our friendship, Sanjay faced a major health crisis. He was over 9,000 miles away from home in a scary situation. And it was the Christians who stepped in and drove him to his medical appointments. Christians started and ran the health clinic that served uninsured populations. Christians helped pay for the discounted services that he couldn’t afford. Mercy ministry gave credibility to share the gospel as Christians demonstrated hospitality and generosity to him.

RELATIONAL EVANGELISM SETS UP DISCIPLING

Sanjay isn’t following Jesus yet, but during our friendship, we had the opportunity to read through the Bible together as he explored the Christian faith. We were able to have dozens of conversations about his questions about the gospel and, through that time, I was able to lay a foundation for what it meant to follow Jesus. 

Sanjay felt like the cost for following Jesus was too high, but that doesn’t mean that this effort was a failure. Sometimes, evangelism doesn’t seem to be working, but we can’t always see what is going on under the surface.

Throughout the entire friendship, Sanjay knew that the Bible was central to the Christian faith, and that you couldn’t follow Jesus alone. He understood that if he was going to follow Jesus, it’d be in connection with other Christians through a local church. And he wrestled with the things that he’d have to leave behind in order to follow Jesus.

While I’m praying that Sanjay comes to know the Lord, I think about the many others who have come to faith through relational evangelism. It’s such a beautiful picture of a long-term vision for following Jesus and making him known when we slow down and focus on building friendships to share the gospel. Relational evangelism sets up discipling.

Take a moment and think about your neighbors, co-workers, and friends. Who is already around you? Who could you invite into the normal rhythms of your life? Relational evangelism will be often inconvenient and time consuming, but it’s beautifully holistic and it sets up discipling down the road.